It is the last day of 2019. The last day in this decade.
Wow. Time has gone by so fast this year.
Tomorrow we wake up in a new month, a new year and a new decade.
I have spent the past few days reflecting on this past year and asking myself what I want out of the year to come. I have a birthday coming up that is bothering me (I will write more about that as the day nears). For now, today, I want to focus on my reflections…..saying good-bye to 2019 and hello to 2020.
The past few years were stressful. And 2019 had some stressing moments, too. But compared to the years before, well 2019 was quiet…. relatively quiet anyway.
Things are well with my family today.
There is light at the end of the very long tunnel for my oldest son. Finally! (more coming on that)
My youngest son is embarking on new and exciting adventures and living each day with his beautiful bride (our amazing daughter-in-love), who herself has accomplished great things this year with a lot of hard work!
The kids are all good.
My husband and I are enjoying this phase, with a little less worry in our days. I resigned from my job at the beginning of the year and focused a little on me and a lot on my family. That was a good move for me.
Yes, 2019 was a good year. (mostly, anyway)
But the year went too fast.
I found that I did not spend as much time in the moment as I had planned for 2019. Sometimes things happen. Life gets in the way and I lose focus. A good year can still have its moments—and curve-balls can still be thrown, even in a good year.
Yet, here I am. And I am grateful the all the good that came in 2019.
Now as I look toward the coming year, I am thinking about what that year will mean for me, where I want to be, who I want to be. As I have shared in the past, I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions. They don’t work for me. Instead I challenge myself, I make the year about growing and becoming a better version of me, I have a yearly mantra.
And that is what I have been contemplating. This next year is hitting me a little hard. Age can do that sometimes. So, I am thinking that after all of the years spent taking care of everyone else, this new year will be about me…. being a little selfish and making the year about taking care of me…. about living each day to its fullest.
There is a quote out there that speaks to me every time I see it—not sure where the quote originated (I have heard a few names) but it is a powerful one—
“You only live once? False! You live every day! You only die once.”
All I have is this day, this moment. I am not promised tomorrow. Yesterday is gone. Today is what I have. And do I want to waste it? Do I want to wallow in my worries? Do I want to stay stuck in the past? Or continue to fear what may or may not come tomorrow? Thinking and living for yesterday or tomorrow means I am missing out on today, the only day I truly have…..
And I do not want to waste it! Absolutely NOT!
I have always been one who strives to live in the moment. I have not always been perfect at it. The past few years had me living in the worry of the past and the fear of the future. So, 2020 is going to be the year that I really, truly live each day, while putting the past behind me and keeping the lessons I have learned. And by letting God take care of tomorrow, trusting that He has it and He has me. All while I am focusing on now, this moment, this day.
And I am going to LIVE each day. Embracing all that each moment, each experience has to offer—I am going to thrive in the chaos and the calm, the quiet and the noisy moments that show me I am alive! My mom didn’t get to do that. But I get to… I cannot waste a single moment, a single day.
Each day is a gift to be treasured. The good, the bad, the mundane. Each day is one more day I get to enjoy–one more sunrise, one more sunset, one more day filled with minutes to treasure and the people I love.
By living each day, knowing it is my day…a gift from God, I will be saying yes to adventures, and I will not let fear stop me. I will get to enjoy all things because I will be present, here now.
2019, you were a good year, much better than the previous few years. And tonight, I bid you farewell.
And I welcome 2020— the year I will live even more mindfully than I already do. The year I take care of me! The year that I will remember that I only die once, but I live every day!
After-all, today is the only day I have! I won’t waste it!
2020 will be the best year yet!